Solidarity forever!
Solidarity forever!
Solidarity forever!
We shall always fight for our right!
Soli-Soli-Soli
(Union chairman mounts podium)
Greatest Nigerian pipu
Great!
Greatest Gbo-Gbo
Greatest Gba-Gba
Greatest of the greatest Nigerian pipu
G-r—rr-ee-aa-t!!!
(Dabid Makus and his cronies join the rally)
Dis govament too wicked sef
Dem no just send poor man at all
Kinleji, instead make you dey find customer
You dey dere dey complain up and down
Na only too fone we don collect since dis strike start
But Dabid, make we sidon tuk dis matter,
Dis strike over subsidy wey dem remove don dey affect awa busyness seriously
Nobody dey come moto park again
I just taya my broda
President Lucky wan kill person
Na my friend Okonji, na im I pity pass
Di man go inewi for Chrismas, e no kon get money take come back
Na very big fool o, e travel no carry im wife go. How im no go travel with that kind wife wey im get?
Anoda man don dey service am for im house
Im wife kukuma neva commot subsidy for her wrapper. (chuckles)
But Dabid, if we tuk truth, dis govament dey try us sha
Shey you hear d kain money wey dem dey use wak for villa
One billion
Ewoh. Na Africa wan chop
See dis one, so you neva hear sef
Dat one no even vex me sef
How one human being go carry sis hundred million as salary my broad, one man, kai (shakes head painfully).
Kinleji, if to sey na me get dat kain money ehn, I go just die. True to God
My wife go no sey, Dabid na great man
Isiewu plus Nkwobi every night
That stupid small gel wey dey whine waste for me go hear am
She dey do iyanga for me, dey swing waste for her papa
She go bow to the great Dabid Makus.
Dabid dat na why you no go ever see dat kain money
Because na so so bad thing you go use am do
If na me wey get sis hundred million, and I dey govament, I go do only good thin
I go destroy dis cabal wey President Lucky dey fear
Because everything thing wey no good for dis country e be like say na cabal cause am
If your wife no fit cook, na cabal
If she no fit perform, na cabal,
Fuel no dey, na cabal,
Road no good, na cabal,
Light no dey, na cabal
If Boko Haram kill, na cabal, I just taya. It is just too bad.
(Police armored trucks arrive rally venue. One Police man takes hold of a Public Address Sytem)
This is Commissioner Sakusi. L. Sakusi, I will not repeat myself
Leave this place at once or else…
Oya start to fire dem
(Tear gas canisters and bullets are released, protesters run for cover).
(Later that Day in Dabid Makus’ home)
Nkem, Nkem, abeg bring my food abeg.
Why you dey shat for my head, na me send you go protest. (Laughs)
Oya sorry my husband, I go make am up to you later (smiles).
Nkem abeg on television, na nine o clock news.
(Nkem turns on TV. Cutlery falls from Dabid’s hand as he stares in disbelief )
(Goggled General makes a broadcast on Television)
Fellow Nigerians,
Due to the recent insecurities in the country in the last few months
We have decided that enough is enough
The Supreme Military Council have dissolved all arms of government
We have dissolved all trade unions and all political parties
We have dissolved all state governments
We have dissolved all things
THE END.
©2012 Otaigbe Itua Ewoigbokhan
NB: The characters used in this piece are fictional and semblance to real persons is entirely coincidental.
Itualive! ™
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